Friendly Rivalries: An Assessment

I boarded the ferry with Professor Kukui, my friend and rival Hau, and the office supplies bandit and we traveled by map to the second island, Akala Island, to continue the Alola challenge.  Apparently there are three challenges on Akala Island with three different Trial Captains.  One of these captains, Mallow, and the Kahuna of the island, Olivia, greeted us at landfall.  I did my best to come up with an appropriate joke for the situation, but all I could think of was "it's really sweet that Marshmallow would come to greet us."  Clearly I shouldn't quit my day job anytime soon.
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Continuing with the trend started in Generation 4 (yes I said Generation 4,:fight me about it), Pokemon Sun offers you the "rival is your friend" plotline.  I have spoken with my similarly-minded friends about this and we came to the conclusion that the whole friendly rival thing doesn't quite work the way that Nintendo/Gamefreak would hope it does.  I would say that the reason for this failure is in the nature of the game as a whole.

Let's look at Gen 1 and 2 as the counter-examples.  These two games had ruthless, tough, mean-spirited rivals that are always one step ahead of you with tough pokemon and tough attitudes.  Blue was cocksure and ambitious.  He had no reservations about admitting that he was out to show the world that he is the best; he was always quick to demean and belittle the main protagonist--the player character.  Gen 2 had Silver--an actual pokemon thief.

"Geez, Silver calm down"

Fast forward to Generation 4, 5, 6, and now 7 and the player's rivals are all childhood friends or new friends of the player character.  Gen 5 tells you, the player, outright that the characters Bianca and Cheren have been your friends from childhood.  The Band of Pokemon thieves in Gen 6 were all one-note character stereotypes (of course the big buy is into dancing, of course the small whiney kid is into collecting and analyzing data, of course the girl is scared of everything--because who cares about breaking down gender and character tropes in artistic media, right?) and they were all presented as friends who are competing with you.

Generation 7's rival character is Hau and Hau's character trait--Hau's only character trait--is that he likes to eat malasada. Woo.

The reason that Blue and Silver always make the short list of everyone's top Pokemon NPC countdowns is because their implementation was in line with the player's expectations of the medium of the videogame.

One plays a video game to be challenged.  A game is a puzzle--it's a thing that needs to be solved.  It's a set of obstacles that present themselves to the player such that the player has an innate desire to push on and overcome these same obstacles.  The reward is coming out on top.  "You did it!  You won!"  In a game you're trying to overcome the odds--it's a natural outcome of the medium.  There's something working against you.  As a direct result of this, it's really easy to put together a mean, intimidating rival for your game.  Your rival, especially in pokemon, is the personification of the game--the game is trying to beat you and your rival is working against you in that same way.  On the other hand, it's nearly impossible to implement a friendly rivalry that works.

The best way to rationalize it is that a friendly rivalry, even in Pokemon, breaks game flow.  It's hard to get a player to care about an NPC.  That's even before we factor into the equation the fact that these same NPC's lack dimension.  It's hard to care about a cardboard cutout--and no amount of Tierno's dancing, nor Hau's joking about food is going to get me to care about them.  It's hard to get someone to care about your video game character as a friend, but it's easy to identify an enemy.

That's why friendly rivalries so easily fall flat on their faces.  In a show or in a book or a comic, these characters could be written in such a way that they are more sympathetic and, dare I say it, friendly.  However, in the medium of "video game", the friendliness of the rivalry undercuts the rules of the game.

If the game is trying to beat you, the avatar and personification of that very same game should be as heckling and mean as well.  It's easier to pull off--and it's just plain better motivation to get good, son.

And this one?  Honestly I don't even know what I should be feeling here...

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Wasn't that a nice diversion?  Here I am teaching you all these things.  You're gonna be so smart by the end of this play through.

I ran into Sina and Dexio, Professor Sycamore's assistants) from Pokemon Y version.  Sina challenged me to a battle.  This was actually interesting for me because I had never seen what kinds of pokemon either one of them uses.  Turns out, she uses Ice Pokemon: Delibird and Glaceon.

[Insert Sex pun here]

Too bad I had Growlie with me, huh?

Three vs. Two: Breaking the Psychic Deadlock

THE PROBLEM

The first generation pokemon games, monumental pieces of video game history to be sure, are mired in gameplay issues and inconsistencies.  The calculation for critical hits, the absolute broken-ness of "wrap", the complete ineffectiveness of the ghost type in general (which couldn't hit normal, nor psychic types): the list goes on and on.  Of all of these issues, the Psychic Deadlock is the most widely known.

It is also the most substantial.

I like to describe Pokemon to those who don't play the games (nonbelievers, infidels, whatever you want to call them) as "extended rock, paper scissors".  It's a game of traits and how they interact with one another.  Choose any trait--it would be strong against some things and weak against other things.  For example, trees would be strong against rain, but weak against axes.  Humans are strong against dying alone, but weak against drain cleaner.  In Pokemon you have your standard fire/water/grass sort of thing going on: fire consumes grass, grass drinks water, water puts out fire, blahblahblah.  The way it worked was intuitive, for the most part.  Fire moves would deal double damage to grass pokemon and grass moves would deal halved damage to fire pokemon. There were many types that interacted in weird and sometimes silly ways.  As a matter of fact, in the first games there were 15 different types of Pokemon:

Grass, Poison, Ground, Flame, Electric, Water, Rock, Flying, Ice, Normal, Bug, Ghost, Fighting and Dragon.

Don't forget about Psychic.

While it was mentioned specifically and repeatedly in both the anime and the games that there was no "universally powerful" type, this was frankly untrue.  As it were, barring the existences of Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and Jesus, this is the first lie that I remember being told.  That type was "psychic".

Theoretically, the Psychic type had the same strengths and weaknesses as any other type.  It was listed as being strong against the fighting and poison types.  It was listed as being vulnerable to bug and ghost types.  On paper, it had the same shortcomings as any other type of pokemon.  The problem was in the execution.

There were 14 psychic pokemon in Generation 1 and even more that could learn psychic moves.  There were only 12 bug pokemon and 3 ghost pokemon in that same generation.  Furthermore, neither of these types had any resistance to psychic moves.  As a matter of fact, no pokemon in generation 1 would receive reduced damage from psychic moves except psychic pokemon themselves.

Sorry Ash, you can never win against a Psychic Pokemon

Here are a few facts.

1) There were 14 psychic pokemon in Gen 1.
2) There were 12 bug pokemon.
3) There were 3 ghost pokemon.
4) There were 33 poison pokemon.
5) There were 7 fighting pokemon.



This means that there were 39 pokemon that had a weakness to psychic moves and only 15 pokemon that had types that were listed as super-effective against the psychic type.

Also, there were only three moves that were introduced in total that dealt extra damage to these psychic pokemon.  These moves were "Twinneedle" (bug type), "Pin Missile" (bug type), and "Lick" (ghost type).  Only five pokemon in the game could learn these moves.  This means that of the 15 pokemon that, theoretically, would be strong against psychic pokemon, only 5 would actually be so effective.

Also Also, four of those pokemon were dual-type pokemon with the poison type.  This means that only one pokemon learned a move that would deal extra damage against a psychic pokemon without receiving extra damage from psychic attacks.  That pokemon was Jolteon and it was not even a bug, nor poison type.

Also Also Also, due to a glitch in the game, the only ghost type move in the game, "Lick", actually dealt zero damage to psychic pokemon.  Wow.

THE GENERATION 2 FIX

Clearly, there was a problem.  Gen 2 fixed this problem by adding two new pokemon types.  These were the "Dark" and "Steel" types.

Dark type pokemon are characterized by being sneaky or ruthless.  This type is called "evil" in Japan and for good reason: some of the first dark pokemon revealed were "witchy crow", and "devil hound". Psychic moves would be ineffective against the dark type.  Dark moves deal increased damage against psychic pokemon.

Steel Pokemon are pokemon that are made of iron or that have some affinity for iron.  Often these pokemon have high physical defenses.  Examples include "metal rock snake" and "magnet".  While steel pokemon do not deal increased damage to psychic types, they are resistant to psychic moves.

With the psychic deadlock finally broken, the pokemon franchise took huge steps towards rebalancing in such a way that made the game more playable.  There really wasn't any one type that was the best--and finally the gameplay reflected this.  I would stop short of saying that it was fixed.  There were some types that were still severely underpowered compared to others and many of these balance issues would persist well into the franchise history.  But by adding two new types, Gold and Silver fixed what was most broken and did so with style.

This and other small mechanics changes would cause major changes in the way the metagame was structured for Generation 2 games.  No one could have foreseen what would happen next...

Next: Breaking the Stall

A Battle with the Champion

I had met the champion before in Lysandre's cafe, but I had forgotten who this Diantha was.  In the best game of all time, Pokemon Red version, I remember being absolutely taken aback by my rival Gary being my final opponent.  Whenever someone had referred to the final gauntlet of trainers in that game, it was always the "Elite Four" or the "Final Four".  It was never the "Elite Four and also the Champion".

Battling Gary specifically, even, was a surprise--and it was even more shocking because the last time I had encountered him in that game was in Saffron City in the Silph building--at least three gym-badges before.  This is exactly enough time to totally forget about that character.

Similarly, the re-introduction of Diantha here was a surprise: "oh yeah, you're still a person aren't you?!" It's not nearly as cool as battling your rival, but it's still something.  It was like battling Steven in Ruby version or Cynthia in Diamond.

Diantha thanked me for taking care of Team Flare and graciously accepted my challenge.  Time for battle!

I find it a little funny that I spent an entire day earlier in this year gushing about how cool Hawlucha is given the fact that it was never formally on my team.  When I made my way through Victory Road, I was reminded of this since it seemed like every single trainer carried one--and all of them had some obnoxious Fairy-killing move like Steel Wing or Poison Jab.

Her first pokemon was Hawlucha.  Is the word I am looking for "opportune" or "destined"?

I had led the match with Hippowdon for tanking and scouting purposes--most of the pokemon I am coming across are physical attackers (like Hawlucha) and Hippowdon can at least put things to sleep and stall them with Sandstorm.  This is exactly what happened, I put Hawlucha to sleep, letting sandstorm whittle it down,then sent in Froakles, hoping to score an easy kill with a super-effective ice beam.  However, Diantha used a Full Restore on the switch.  The result of this is that I switched my Greninja into a fully healthy Hawlucha who not only outspeeds my low-level ninjafrog, but also hits it super-effectively (since Fighting is strong against Dark). 

After sacrificing Greninja to get a free switch-in, I chose Venusaur for some sleep powder/leech seed stalling while I used Revive and hyper potion.  I was positive that I would need that froggie later in the match.

I had calculated it so that Venusaur would survive four hits after Hawlucha woke up, so I set-up my now-trademark "Leech Seed KO/Solarbeam switch KO" move (charging Solarbeam on a turn such that it will hit a switch-in pokemon after a KO).  The issue is that Hawlucha scored a critical hit at the most important part of the exchange and Venusaur was taken out.  Hippowdon had just enough durability to take out Hawlucha.

I remembered her next pokemon, Aurorus, from a trainer battle following my eighth gym match.  Aurorus is the evolution of the fossil pokemon I got at the start of the game--and is Rock/Ice typed.

Now, what do both Ice and Rock HATE?

I sent in Lucario and immediately "went Mega".  The question was whether I wanted to risk MegaLuk's health with a turn 1 Swords Dance or if I wanted to go for the sweep immediately.  I play dangerously.  Mega Lucario used Swords Dance against Aurorus, who used Reflect (thank you).

The rest of the match was an easy sweep: Lucario One-Hit KO'ed Aurorus with Aura Sphere, then the bulky Dragon Goodra with Close Combat and the evolution of the fossil Tyrunt, Tyrantrum, with another Close Combat.

Her next pokemon was the Grass/Ghost pokemon Gourgeist, but I had taught Lucario Shadow Claw when I took on the Psychic gym for type coverage, so the Swords Dance-boosted super-effective ghost move One Hit KO'ed Gourgeist as well.  Lucario just cannot be stopped.

Her final pokemon was Gardevoir, who actually surprised me by Mega-Evolving, but Lucario outsped it and defeated it in one hit as well.

No Quarter: Battle at the Summit

What better way to truly test the strength of my new pokemon team than to battle my rival--a trainer whose strongest pokemon is 13 levels higher than mine?

Serena seems to have been busy since the last time we have fought each other, having added a bulky Altaria to her team in addition to her fully evolved Chesnaught and Vaporeon.  The presence of Absol and Meowstic are the pokemon on her side that shy her team away from being a true "Bulky Offensive" squad (my second favorite battle strategy, by the way).
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The "Rival as your friend" thing that the Pokemon series has been glomming-onto since Sapphire version has never really worked for me until fairly recently.  I guess I can attribute this to me being a dumb teenager for most of that time (I think I was fourteen when Sapphire version came out) and the one thing teenagers like more than pretending that no one understands them is being contentious. 

As a result, I wanted all of my enemies to be true enemies--and all of the battles all the time to be "epic" or "badass" without really knowing what either of these words really mean.  Even as early as last year I didn't like the "Friendly Rival" trend because I thought it was juvenile.  Now, though, I think I am starting to see what Nintendo/Gamefreak is going for.

Your rival doesn't have to be a huge jerk or even a classic "bad guy" to be threatening--and they don't need to be an imposing presence to challenge you and get you excited about a fight.  In real life there are surely people who are asses who give you a hard time.  These are people that you just can't wait to "show" as in "I'll show you one day" or "some day you'll see".  These types of rival-characters follow naturally from the "mean jerk" trope that was so especially pervasive in the 90's and early 2000's.  I am not saying that this trope is not currently relevant or motivational, but it is less effective at creating a compelling story.

More often than not the real motivators in life are the friends you know.  They are always challenging you to score better on your tests, work harder at your job, lift the bar for five more pounds, or do one more chin up.  In real life, you always feel better competing against these people as friends and rivals--and the result is a lot more of a fulfilling "hero's journey".  Battling Serena is about testing your mettle and your intestinal fortitude--and it is not one bit less exhilarating than battling Blue at the end of Pokemon Red...well, maybe just one little bit...

Now I should really stop talking about this--before I say something crazy like, "Pokemon Y has taught me to be a better person".
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The battle itself was something of a stall-fest with Serena tanking-out most of my hits and me learning how to use my Venusaur's Mega-Evolution.  Up until this point I have been using Mega Lucario and Mega Aerodactyl, but since Aero' has been left in the PC for the trip through Victory Road, I wanted to test out the durability of Mega-V.

Part of the reason the battle took so long was that I was using the opportunity to figure out what Venusaur can and can't handle in terms of stalling.  My Venusaur is currently running Sleep Powder/Poisonpowder/Leech Seed/Solarbeam at time of writing, so knowing what it can set-up on is crucial to my future Elite Four success.

The results of my experimentation: Mega Venusaur is an absolute tank.  Victory against Serena: 4-0.

Current Squad:

GRENINJA/Froakles/lvl.54
VENUSAUR/Venus/lvl.52
FLAREON/Rox/lvl.51
LUCARIO/Knives/lvl.53
DRAGALGE/Toxie/lvl.49
AERODACTYL/Scarydactyl/lvl.49

On Rotation: Gardevoir, Pikachu, Hippowdon, Scrafty

Special and Physical

With all the Generation-1 pokemon (Red and Blue versions) running all over the place I find myself more and more nostalgic about my old Pokemon Red playthroughs (R.I.P. Haunter/BLACK FOG).  As a queer side-effect of this, I've been turtling myself more and more into the ways of the older games.  Guess I'll never quite get over this disease I have: adulthood.
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I am actually in the small but stubborn camp of people who thinks that the first generation's treatment of Special vs. Physical attacks and defenses makes the most sense.  Back then there was no such thing as Special Attack and Special Defense, there was just "SPECIAL" which was your attacking and your defending stat for Special moves.  What made an attack a special attack or a physical attack was just the element of the move in question: fire = special, fighting = physical.

The current split for Special and Physical attacks occurred in the diamond and pearl era and it is that attacks which require physical contact or that use physical objects (rocks, swords, scythes, etc.) are physical--and attacks that don't require physical contact are special.  As far as special goes, it is basically just beams and stuff, or things that are more ethereal. Pretty straightforward, totally understand what they are going for, and furthermore this allows a fire pokemon to use both physical fire moves like fire punch and special fire moves like flamethrower.  It totally makes sense from a gameplay perspective and Gyarados is still grateful for this.  Alternatively, a rock type can attack physically with rock throw or specially with power gem.  I am still not quite sure what the hell a power gem is and what makes it a "rock" technique, but I digress.

This "new" special/physical model makes sense by basically having physical moves--moves that require a pokemon to use its muscles--scale in damage with a pokemon's attacking stat as its strength. The logic is that whether a punch is normal type (mega punch) or fire type (fire punch) it should still depend on how strong the pokemon throwing it is.

Special and Physical defenses, on the other hand, are a bit less obvious.  Physical defenses refer to the resiliency of a pokemon to getting punched in the face.  Obviously a pokemon like Onix would be able to be punched in the face to less effect than, say, Pichu.  Special defense, on the other hand, doesn't really mean anything.  Is this a stat based on the pokemon's reflectivity?  How well it refracts all those ice beams in order to take less ice beam damage?  Is it the presence of flame-retardant skin?  Or a gelatinous body that is resistant to cold or heat-based moves?  But aren't these all physical attributes anyways?  We'll get back to this...

I want to take this opportunity to point out that I  do not disagree with this way of looking at it, but I feel that this is only part of the equation and that it misses some of the narrative subtlety of the "older ways".

Under the old ways, certain types of moves were deemed "special" moves and all other moves were said to be "regular" or retroactively, "physical" moves.  Special moves included any fire moves, any ice moves, and any electrical, grass, water, or psychic moves (fine, technically "dragon" too, but there were no damage-dealing dragon attacks back then).  Everything else was physical: rock, poison, normal, fighting, ground, etc.

The particularly quick (or at least the particularly not-stupid) already see that any fire move, be it fire punch or flamethrower, is special.  While this seems to be an issue given my previously noted grievances, it actually makes sense in its own way: special moves don't refer to whether a move makes physical contact or not--but rather refer to the element of the move in question.  This is why a fire punch is special--it is a regular punch that is charged with the element of fire--which is something that not every pokemon can manage with proficiency.

Regular moves, in this paradigm,are not moves that make direct contact, but are moves that don't require any particular extra ability to use.  Basically, any pokemon could feasibly pick up a rock and throw it at a foe (rock throw), any pokemon could throw out a punch (karate chop), but not every pokemon has the ability or wherewithal to make their punch crackle with electricity (thunderpunch).  Naturally, not every pokemon has the proper training to execute every single regular move, but a regular move is basically a move where a pokemon needs not require the ability to summon special energies.  The word special is slightly misleading.  Special really refers to elemental prowess.

This also makes sense from the "defense" side: a pokemon with a high "special" is more in-tune with the elements, so not only would they be able to summon elements with more proficiency, but they would similarly be able to brush off elemental attacks with that same proficiency.  Finally, a "special defense" that works!  Why, oh why, did you have to split it into Special Attack and Special Defense, Nintendo?!?


Neither method is perfect.  The old way has issues rectifying things like why an Alakazam (which is not a particularly muscular pokemon) can punch someone for minimal damage with mega punch, but can then tear an opponent apart with a fire-charged punch.  The new way has trouble answering the question of how a meathead like a Hitmonchan has the ability to summon fire, ice, and electricity for its punches with extreme proficiency--as well as the question of what the hell special defense is and what bullshit reflective skin a Blissey must have in order to take fire blast for minimal damage but to cripple in fear of a fire punch.

The Vile Lysandre

Lysandre certainly takes the cake for being the most evil person in the pokemon world.  Let me elaborate.

As the battle came to a close, Lysandre made note that before we removed the Yveltal batteries, the machine still had enough power to be fired exactly once to destroy the facility.  Lysandre was trying to take us all out with him.  Cue Metroid-Style Escape!

Lysandre killed himself while trying to kill the kids that defeated him.  This is a bit crazy, but the thing is, he kept his pokemon on his person when this happened, so he also killed all of his pokemon.  I can't be the only one that finds this a little macabre: he killed himself and killed his pokemon too.  I don't know what could be more evil than this.  I guess the real-world analogue would be if you set your house on fire and died with all your pets and family.

I guess it makes sense for Pokemon to be able to die--otherwise what is the purpose of Lavender Tower?  I have just never actually witnessed the death of a pokemon.  I was the last one to see that Gyarados alive...then I beat it up...and then it was gone forever.  My character was the last person to see that Gyarados, and the last thing I did to it was Aura Sphere it in its big, stupid face.
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The pokemon gang was apparently doing a lot off screen to help the cause and this only came up at the very end.  After escaping from the facility and watching the whole place get vaporized and sucked back into the earth, we all regrouped amongst the ashes. Tierno (the dancing one) was apparently helping to release all the captured pokemon in a nearby route and Trevor was helping evacuate the town (or something). 

The fact that you were a part of a big Anti-Flare effort actually goes a long way towards bringing you in as a believable main character--and makes the world a lot more alive.  This is much easier to swallow than the idea that you could single-handedly take out all the Rockets.  The whole game is a lot more believable from this standpoint.

I never quite got the idea of purposefully disturbing Groudon or Kyogre--who are literally in the process of tearing the world apart at the time that you hunt them down to battle them.  In this game, you do end up fighting a scary legend, but it kind of happens by accident.  When you end-up catching Yveltal, its really only because the thing was so angry from being asleep for so long that it wanted to hurt you.  You weren't just looking for trouble and a new catch, you were attacked and you sent out your pokemon to defend you.  You only catch Yveltal because if you don't, it would hurt you.

A lot about this game is incredibly well thought-out, especially when compared with previous installments of the game.  This may be the best game since Red version.

Current Squad:

GRENINJA/Froakles/lvl.42
VENUSAUR/Venus/lvl.41
FLAREON/Hotfoot/lvl.42
SCRAFTY/Scrappy/lvl.41
HIPPOWDON*/Leviathan/lvl.43
AERODACTYL/Scarydactyl/lvl.40

On Rotation: Lucario, Gardevoir, Pikachu, Skrelp

Team Flare Makes a Move

No sooner had I left the gym than I got a Holo-message from Lysandre, the fellow with the lion's mane who introduced himself to me as the villain near the start of the game (which was nice of him I guess).  Apparently, he was sending this message to trainers everywhere that he was ordering Team Flare to kill everyone in the entire world.

I guess I kind of forgot what was going on in this game and this message reminded me that there was still a story in this thing--and now it is most certainly the time for me to figure out what is going on. 

I pursued Team Flare to Lysandre's Cafe in Lumiose City and found the secret entrance hidden behind the bookcase in the back guarded by two Team Flare Table-Waiters.  This seems familiar...
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Another one of the things I really loved about the earlier games is that they would tell you what to do (or not) by making you put the pieces together yourself.  Pokemon White (and, to a lesser extent, Pokemon Sapphire) spent far too much time talking about what was going on and where you should go.  Go to the Dragonspiral Tower, which is where the legendary dragon pokemon are found, Now go to the Relic Castle to get Zekrom, No, Zekrom isn't here, go back to the City with the Swamp whatever it was called in that game.  That game could not stop explaining things to you and I just felt dumb having to deal with its constantly condescending dialogue.  Not to mention the dialogue was shit to begin with.

This game is kind of a happy middle-ground.  I was shown Lysandre's Cafe earlier in the game in a scripted story event where I met the Professor (on my second tour of Lumiose City), so I knew where it was and that Lysandre owned it.  My fellow Pokemon Thief gang-member (and game Rival) Serena told me that we should look for Team Flare's HQ.  All I had to do was put these two pieces together and I found the place.  Not quite as difficult as curing cancer (and most certainly not as hard as figuring out the opposite-day logic that you needed the Pokeflute to get into the Silph Co. Building), but it was enough to make me feel good about using that fancy Graduate-School education I've been neglecting for the past two years.

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After battling Lysandre himself (he had a Pyroar, go figure), I made my way through a conveyor-belt/teleporter maze, trying to find the administrator with the lift key (yup, definitely been here before).

Along the way, I encountered battles ranging from easy to absurdly difficult.  Of special note was a Malamar which kept boosting its own stats while using Superpower (due to its ability, which raises stats instead of lowering them) and one particularly hairy match against a high level Drapion, who used Acupressure two consecutive times to luckily sharply raise its Attacking power and Speed.  That Drapion tore me apart my first attempt.

At the end, I was treated with a story that I guess was supposed to explain all the "3000 year legend" references people have been making this whole game, but which in reality just made matters even more confusing.  The story was about a guy whose Floette died making a machine that brought it back to life at the cost of the lives of many other pokemon.  Team Flare made it perfectly clear that their doomsday machine is the same machine as this one.

After I failed to stop Team Flare from activating the machine, I was pointed in the direction of Geosenge City again.

Current Squad:

GRENINJA/Froakles/lvl.41
VENUSAUR/Venus/lvl.40
FLAREON/Hotfoot/lvl.42
SCRAFTY/Scrappy/lvl.42
HIPPOWDON*/Leviathan/lvl.40
AERODACTYL/Scarydactyl/lvl.40

On Rotation: Pikachu, Gardevoir, Lucario

Stealing all the Pokeballs!

The next stop on what has become less of a pokemon gym challenge and more of a pokemon gym sight-seeing tour (there should really be a "Hard" mode) was the Pokeball Factory to the north of town.  I had already scouted this area before my gym battle, so I knew that Team Flare would be there and since they were blocking access to route 15 I knew I had to take them out of town.

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One of the things I really liked about Pokemon Red was that when Team Rocket takes-over Saffron City, you aren't forced to fight them right away.  As a matter of fact, you could go ahead and complete much of the rest of the game and come back to deal with them near the end.  Alternatively, you can fight them right after getting the Pokeflute and gather the sixth gym badge (Sabrina's badge) out of order--earlier than the fifth (Koga's) badge (something I only recently realized is atypical of first time Pokemon Red players).

Pokemon White and, to a lesser extent, Pokemon Y have a real problem with giving the player any control over their own journey.  They are like the overprotective parent who keeps a too-close watch over what their kid is doing, "No, no, no, you can't be going in the sandox now...You just ate, so no going near the pool...Wouldn't it be so much nicer to play ball here where I can see you?"  I think Pokemon Red is like a parent who tells you what you can't do and lets you go free and Pokemon WhYte is the one that tells you what you can do--and the difference is night-and-day.
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Team Flare had taken-over the pokeball factory in order to steal all the pokeballs.  I actually think this is a pretty good move on their part--if they are the only ones with pokeballs then they can either control who gets pokemon or they could get rich while controlling who gets pokemon.  Either way, they control who gets pokemon.

I find it funny how they were the bad guys for stealing all the pokeballs, but that I was the good guy even though I picked up what is most likely an equal amount of pokeball loot from items on the factory floor.  It's not stealing if you found it, right?  Or perhaps it's the universal gaming law of "finders-keepers".

Scrappy is having some trouble these days, so I'm hoping that he will evolve soon.

Current Team:

FROGADIER/Froakles/lvl.35
VENUSAUR/Venus/lvl.35
FLAREON/Hotfoot/lvl.34
SKRELP/Toxie/lvl.35
HIPPOWDON/Leviathan/lvl.34
AERODACTYL/Scarydactyl/lvl.35

On Rotation: Gardevoir, Pikachu, Lucario, Scrappy

Escape from the Parfume Palace

The problem with the sidequests in Pokemon games is that they inevitably boil down to "find item X and rub it on slot Y" until the supporting characters tell you how smart you are.  Thus it is with my character and Shauna (the most insufferable of the Pokemon Thieves, whose only character trait is "being a girl"): sent to "find Pokeflute and rub it on Snorlax" until it wakes up.

Apparently, though, I had to find the king of the palace's poodle in the gardens first, so this quest went from annoying to infuriating real quick.

I found the dog and played the "Farfetch'd game" (to catch a trainer's pokemon by chasing it around) from Pokemon Silver version and found myself watching fireworks with Shauna.  I have no clue where these events fit in logically with one another, but rest assured that they were all mandatory and definitely related to my quest to catch all the pokemon.

At this point, Nintendo once again tried to shove its stupid characters in my face with its terrible, terrible writing by having Shauna say that she was really happy to watch the fireworks because "[she] has never watched fireworks alone with a boy before."

NO, I reject this.  I will not accept a crappy love story on top of your crappy regular story.  I have to go lie down.
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I sarcastically alluded to the fact that Pokemon White and Y are both terrible in terms of character development in a few previous posts and I want to clarify my feelings on this matter.  I recognize that the best Pokemon game of all time, Pokemon Red version, was similarly plagued by "disposable character syndrome". 

Want to know if your game has DispCharSynd? Try to describe your supporting cast in any way without describing their job or their physical features.  If your only description ends up being something like "has a dog", "likes to dance" or "closet homosexual", then your character is shallow and useless and if it were a marine in "Aliens", it would most certainly be one of the ones that are killed off early and easily.

The thing is that Red version ALSO didn't have a real plot.  This was a game written back in the days where the entire story was told in the booklet that comes with the game--and the rest is made up by the player.  White Version and Y version, however, are given considerably less slack in the story and character-development areas of the game simply because they TRY too hard in these areas.  If White version took some time off pushing its hamfisted message of Pokemon suffrage into your face every 5 seconds and instead focused on letting you, the player, run the story, it could have gotten away with having odious and inconsequential characters, but since it spent so much time banging-on about its plot, the cast members were too easily exposed for the cardboard cutouts that they were.  The result is that you have presented a roller coaster and populated the entire thing with cardboard cutouts of "Winnie the Pooh".  Not necessarily a bad ride, but perhaps a little distracting and you have the constant feeling of shame and indigestion.

Side Commentary: If Pokemon Were Real...

The other day I was fortunate enough to catch the special series anime "Pokemon Origins" (you can probably find it online if you want, but out of respect for the material I won't provide a link myself).  This is a four-episode special that involves the journey of Red as he learns the ropes of the Pokemon world along his journey alongside his Charmander to become the League Champion.

It was very good--and it was also done in such a way that the source material was a little more believable--and of course this brought up the question that EVERYONE asks: What if Pokemon were real?  Or more accurately, what would be your pokemon squad if you were a real trainer?

Typically when kids answer this question, the obvious examples come up: Gyarados, Rhydon, Charizard, blah, blah, blah.  I feel that this is a little bit inaccurate--or rather--absolutely ridiculous.  Most average people can barely train a dog, much less a fighting animal.  The fact is that 90ish% (and this number is COMPLETELY fabricated, by the way) of people just fundamentally could not find either the time or the endurance to do this.  Even if they could, the idea that they could control something huge like a Gyarados or a Charizard or a Rhydon is furthermore ridiculous.

Imagine these things in real life.  Pretty freaking huge huh?  And scary?  You bet.  Now try showing these animals that YOU are the dominant one in the pair.  You've gotta be a pretty intimidating sonnuvabitch to stare down a Gyarados.

What about an Arbok?  Think you have the nerves to gain the respect and control of an 11-foot long snake?  Or even a 2-foot tall, 40 pound Raticate?

Another thing to note:  No Ghost Pokemon.  I have this feeling that if you started to hang-out with a Ghost pokemon, you will just end up getting increasingly depressed--and eventually just give up on your journey.  I view Ghosts to be like bringers of bad luck or like parasites that would feed on your suffering: just having one around would be a battle of endurance.

Furthermore, just look outside and see what kinds of creatures you see.  A lot of squirrels and bugs and birds, huh?  If pokemon were real, nearly all trainers' teams would include at least one Rattata, Pidgey, or Caterpie.

One more thing: If Pokemon were real, Eevee would be a trendy designer product for rich people.

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It's funny how when you give up on finding a pokemon, it always tends to show-up out of no where.  Right after I gave up on looking for Pikachu, I was able to find and capture one, which I named "PikaPi".

With a giant smile on my face, I made it to Santalune City, future site of my first gym battle.  Soon after entering, I found a guy who offered to trade his Farfetch'd for a Bunnelby. 

I've always had a strange affinity for Farfetch'd.  I mean, you've gotta love the swagger that the duck must have in order to carry around the leek stick that it will eventually be seasoned with before being eaten.  Kind of morbid in an oddly self-aware way.

After getting Pikachu and Farfetch'd, I decided that the night couldn't get any better, so I called it an evening.

Current Squad:

FROAKIE/Froakles/lvl.9
METAPOD/Felix/lvl.8
ZIGZAGOON/Ziggy/lvl.8
SCATTERBUG/Bubbsy/lvl.7
PIKACHU/PikaPi/lvl.5
FARFETCH'D/Quackin'/lvl.10

The End of Pokemon White

Not really much to say about the anticlimax of the century: I beat "N" with only "Tusks" the Haxorus (there HAS to be an "overpowered Dragon-type" joke in there somewhere...) and then I fought Ghestis (the true villain) afterwards and similarly beat him in 8 moves using only Haxorus. 

Afterwards, I got a pep talk from "N" about pursuing my dreams or some nonsense like that.

And then the credits rolled...
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I'm not sure how I feel about Pokemon White being over--on the one hand the writing was heavy-handed and the plot was fantastically bad, but the pokemon designs were interesting and the world layout was...satisfactory.  Okay, I guess coming up with things I liked is a little difficult.

Now, I'm just being critical because I love the Pokemon series so don't take this the wrong way, but Pokemon White was not a good game.  I'm not saying it was bad, it was just average.

Why do you play pokemon?  The story?  I sure hope not, the story for this game was good, but not great: it definitely suffered from "Decent Premise, Terrible Writing Syndrome".  The idea of whether or not Pokemon training is ethical was great to bring up--and injected an excellent bit of self-awareness for a series which has always been "Shoot First, Ask Questions Later".

The problem with this is that the whole "pokemon battles as arguments of ideals" allegory that this game was pushing the whole time (Zekrom and Reshiram themselves, representing dissenting opinions) fell absolutely flat on its face along with the entirety of the game's dialogue, which ranged from "bad" to "unforgivably bad".  I wonder if the entire game was written on "Take your kid to work day"...

No, you play a pokemon game for the battling and the pokemon design and selection.  Here, the game wasn't terrible, but it still didn't shine.  For every cool-looking Leavanny or Scraggy, there was a dumb-looking Stunfisk or an uninspired Klink, Vanilluxe, or Cryogonal.  As a matter of fact, the total number of stupid-looking pokemon definitely outnumbers the cool ones that I remember--and the negatives from this game are most definitely the things I recall the most.

I can't remember one bad thing about Red and Blue version...wait, I just remembered Rock Tunnel...
nevermind.  But Silver Version--there we are, that's the example I will use.  Silver version was perfect I think.  I can't recall a bad section of the game: awesome pokemon design, access to good pokemon early (but not overpowered ones) in order to get you hooked--constantly changing environments and a story that was compelling and not in-your-face the whole time banging-on about friendship or dreams or arguments or some nonsense like that.

Ruby was good I guess--less homogenous in terms of pokemon access (as in, you tended to get about 40 cool new pokemon at a time followed by hours of gameplay where no new monsters appear) and a bit too plot-heavy (I never DID get behind that "legendary pokemon as a main plot point" thing), but overall solid.

Diamond and Pearl I can't for the life of me remember--must not have liked them very much--and I never DID like those three starter options.  Turtwig, Chimchar, Piplup: Dumb, Dumb, Dumb.  While I know many people will disagree with that last statement, it is my opinion and I would just like to say: nanna-nanna-boo-boo, stick your head in doo doo.

So Pokemon White?  Put it above Diamond and Pearl but below Red and Silver versions.  Maybe just below Ruby and Sapphire.

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But today isn't about goodbyes, it is about new beginnings.  I thought I was done with Pokemon--but Nintendo just keeps me hanging on.  A new game is out--and that means a new Pokemon Playthrough.  Therefore, I am proud to announce the start of:

I have reset my trainer card to reflect the change:

Of course you can continue to expect witty commentary, snide remarks, and what I consider humor.