Reshiram

As soon as I left the building, I was met by the namby-pamby squad of Cheren and Bianca who went on about...something or other...I don't really pay attention to what they say anymore. Anyways, Gymleader Bryce decided to join us where he pointed out that there were ninjas hiding behind our backs...no clue how we didn't notice this without his help...

I had seen these ninjas before--they're N's personal guard and they call themselves the shadow triad--why are they called the shadow triad? Why, because they lack subtlety of course!

They told me to meet N at Dragonspiral Tower, which has now been hyped-up more than Y2K, and I gladly obliged.


Dragonspiral Tower is a fairly boring ruin which is populated entirely by two things: pokemon called Golette (which I caught) and Team Plasma. After battling twenty-something of the goons and reaching the top without breaking a sweat, I found N at the top with what must have been the most gigantic pigeon in the universe--which he revealed to be the legendary pokemon Reshiram whose only rival, apparently, is a pokemon called Zekrom, the yang to his yin.

Right before N flew away upon the back of Reshiram, he told me that I should definitely awaken the second apocalyptic legendary pokemon, Zekrom. Now let me get one thing straight--it is never a good idea to awaken a pokemon whose last appearance caused the world to be destroyed in a flash of hellfire--and this is a fact that I just assumed everyone else agreed with me on. But as soon as I met up with Alder, Bryce, the pimp of the year, and the namby-pamby squad, they seemed to be under the impression that it was a good idea to listen to the bad guys and awaken the god of destruction.

Regardless of whether or not a ten-year-old boy had the ability to control a being from beyond time and space whose every movement causes ripples through reality and drive people in futures for decades to come insane, I just thought that it was never a good idea to play right into the plans of the bad guys.

However, this is a pokemon game and it looks like its time for the whole Team Plasma ordeal to be taken care of, so its off to Relic Castle!

Current Squad:

Fraxured Facts

Now that I finally had a mission, I marched on Dragonspiral Tower--which was apparently closed for renovations because there was no entrance. Along the trip back, "Terk" evolved into Carracosta (who is, by the way, absolutely awesome!) so at least some good came from the journey.

I traveled East and found more evidence that this game was written by 12-year-olds because Team Plasma was once again standing in the middle of the path and talking quite loudly to no one in particular about how their friends were "working a job in Dragonspiral Tower which is near Iccarus City"--ZING! So...can't continue until I resolve Dragonspiral Tower, but can't get in yet...must mean it's time to get my seventh badge!

See, a gym badge is something you typically get as you're on your way to more important things--like you can pick one up when your wife tells you to buy some milk on the way back from work. But going into this battle I was a little apprehensive because both "Knives" and "Tusks" (the Axew) are incredibly weak against Ice. Turns out I didn't need to worry because Tusks single-handedly KOed every pokemon (which included one Vanillish, one Beartic, and one Cryogonal) within eight turns. Afterward, Axew evolved into Fraxure (I must be on a roll because this guy is awesome as well)!

So I battled Gymleader Bryce who definitely isn't Gymleader Pryce from Gold Version at all--and I totally called it that I would be meeting-up with the "namby-pamby squad"--Cheren and Bianca--immediately after the battle.

Current Squad: